patience

31 days of training my kids: over and over

~ Christie ~ Leave a comment
Thanks to my sweet friend Liz who takes such fun pictures of the girls!
Thanks to my sweet friend Liz who takes such fun pictures of the girls!

When my sweet little Hopey was learning to talk I remember how curious it was to me that she would say words over and over. Being my first, it didn’t bother me at all; I just found it so interesting. (Clearly I had not spent much time with babies)

At some point it occurred to me that that was how she learned. That was how she mastered her words and concepts. I’m pretty sure she didn’t think, “That word ‘cracker’ is hard one; I better say it over and over so I don’t forget!” But even at a young age, the idea that practice makes permanent is built into our bodies.

When we practice something over and over, we will eventually be able to do it without thinking.

This is the beauty and the hardship of training children. We can teach them to obey even as very small children, but it takes a fair amount of effort.

Over and over.

Thankfully, we’re given plenty of opportunities. (even without “Here, let me show you what I expect and let’s think of a fun way to practice” times)

Kids have to eat… over and over.

Brothers and sisters have to play together… over and over.

Toys have to be cleaned up… over and over. (even if it is a few days in between on occasion) = )

Seat belts have to be buckled… over and over. Oh what a happy day in our house when the oldest two could do this without complaining or getting frustrated!

Wants have to be put aside… over and over.

Mommy has an opportunity to practice patience… over and over.

Mommy has an opportunity to model confession… over and over.

We go back to the gospel after being all out of sorts… over and over.

It can be so frustrating when kids slip back into habits or attitudes that we thought had been taken care of. But it’s always worth it to keep talking, keep teaching, keep disciplining, keep modeling… over and over.

****

The grand and glorious things we’ve been working on this week have been no more than sitting in your chair correctly at the table and obeying with a good attitude. This is not the first week we’ve worked on these things, nor will it be the last.

What have you been working on this week?

Monday Morning Mystery!

~ Christie ~ 4 Comments
Green marker found scribbled on wall: approximately 9 am
Green marker found scribbled on wall: 9 am
Green marker without lid: found: approximately 9:15 am
Green marker found without lid: 9:15 am
Suspect spotted with green marker on cheek: approximately 9:30 am
Suspect spotted with green marker on cheek: 9:30 am

Solved!

I do apologize for the poor quality of the evidence photos; but after all, most suspects don’t stand still.

10 Ways to entertain small children at long, boring doctor’s appointments

~ Christie ~ 2 Comments

Ever been taken back to a room at the doctor’s office, have a nurse weigh your child, ask if you have any questions, and then say the Doctor will be right in?

Sleepy
Sleepy

Ever found yourself wondering if that nurse remembered to tell that Doctor that you were even there?

Here are ten ways to be proactive at entertaining your children while waiting in the doctor’s office. (Please note: these would not really be appropriate for the waiting area, but are fair game once in the room.)

Edited 10 ways photo1. Play I-Spy. The rooms at our pediatrician’s office are very colorful, so this is always something the girls want to do.

2. Play Simon Says. My girls are a little too young for this, so it’s really just a glorified version of “Do what Mommy says.” Hey, why not throw in having them respond with, “Yes, Mommy!” and make it a training exercise as well?

3. Play Ring-Around-The-Rosie. It’s okay, I promise.

4. Give bumpy horsey rides with the kids on your knees.

5. Explain the different “doctor” equipment in the room.

6. Play Peek-a-Boo.

7. Sing songs softly. Especially ones with fun action or hand motions.

8. Play copycat. Do something and have the children imitate you. (Jumping jacks, standing on one foot, turning around, making a silly face… they love this one; especially once they get to be “the cat.”)

9. Play thunderstorm. Pretend it’s raining and everyone has to huddle under an umbrella to stay dry. (The girls actually made this one up; they love to make rain noises by slapping their laps.)

10. And if the doctor is still not there, Repeat.

Stick out your tongues!
Stick out your tongues!

The point is to be creative and be happy. If you are impatient, your children probably will be, too.

Sad faces
Sad faces

Really the sky is the limit.

Laugh!
Laugh!

Last time we went, I happened to have a brush in my purse because we rushed out so early and I hadn’t had time to really get them ready. So we played beauty shop; I fixed their hair while talking to them in my awful imitation Brooklyn accent. They thought it was hilarious. (If they only knew it was helping me stay sane as well… )

Silly faces!
Silly faces!

What do you do to occupy your children while waiting?

Oh yeah, and if all else fails, tell them to make faces and take pictures. = )

What does a spiritual leader look like?

~ Christie ~ 4 Comments

4227948405_217e50071a_bAwhile back, I was reading at a prominent Christian mom blog. A particular and common topic brought on a myriad of thoughts; I came over here to write them out, unsure if they would ever be published. I have been thinking about it a lot, though, so I decided to go for it. As always, I would love to hear your thoughts.   

The question was posed, “What questions do you have regarding your marriage relationship?” The readers were supposed to leave their questions by way of comment to be answered in future posts by a mom and daughter.

The overwhelming majority of questions dealt with how to handle a husband that isn’t the spiritual leader he should be.

This question at once resonated with and unsettled me. Of course, I have felt and wondered about this same thing at times, but there has been a huge change in how I think about this matter in the last few years. Besides that, it didn’t look as pretty coming from other women as it did from myself.

So… what does a spiritual leader look like?

There are three major thoughts that come to mind regarding this issue, but I’m just going to start with one of them. (I don’t want to be blacklisted by my gender!) = )

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According to the Bible, one of my major roles as a married woman is to be the keeper (despot) at our home. Not just the figurative, emotional part of the home… the home: the toilets, rugs, baseboards, pantry, schedules, sleeping quarters, etc.

I don’t know about you, but I was no ready-made homemaker when I got married. In fact, quite the opposite… minus a hundred thousand. I am and always will be everlastingly grateful that my husband was patient with me regarding this. After six years, I’ve come a long way, but I have so much farther to go before I will even close to consider myself equal to most of the people I know.

Don’t you think that we as women might just be a little bit hard on our guys regarding this “spiritual leadership” issue? I mean, most guys don’t have any experience at spiritual leadership when they get married. So they gave a devotion in teen group? Were a prayer leader at Christian college? Led a discipleship group in their church? That no more prepares a man to “lead” an emotionally charged, newlywed girl/woman, then a high school cooking class prepares a woman to feed a gargantuan, hungry man… every day, on a budget.

How would you like for your husband to comment every time you left dishes in the sink too long? or were impatient with the children? or didn’t put much effort into making a nutritious, filling dinner? or for that matter, slept in and didn’t read your Bible? I know some women experience this regularly (thankfully, I’m not one of them); I doubt it’s a pleasant or inspiring experience.

Here, simply put, is my first question regarding husbands, wives, marriage, and spiritual leadership.

Are we too hard on our husbands regarding their God-given marital roles while giving ourselves unending patience and grace?

More than likely, yes.

A relationship has an atmosphere. Criticism and impatient waiting don’t mix well with love and support. Patience and grace can create an environment where small steps are encouraged, not avoided for fear of failure.

Besides that, we wives probably have enough work to on with ourselves for a while. When you take your eyes off of someone else’s faults and begin to concentrate on your own, things really do brighten up.

****

Has anyone else noticed this widespread dissatisfaction? What are your feelings on the matter?

The Patience Store

~ Christie ~ Leave a comment
Hopey
Hopey
Fia
Fia
Gracie-poo
Gracie-poo
Mckayla-roo
Mckayla-roo

Have you ever said something to your children that came back to bite you; or convict you?

I don’t remember the exact circumstances surrounding this event, but I do know that Sophia was having trouble being patient.

I oh-so-lovingly-and-gently said, “Sophia, you need to be patient.” She replied unsatisfactorily a few times before I again insisted, “Sophia, you must be patient.”

Her response was classic. “But I don’t have any more patience!”

An idea popped into my head. “Well, you’ll just have to go get some.”

“Where?” she asked suspiciously.

“From The Patience Store.”

“But I don’t have any money.” This kid didn’t get off the boat yesterday.

I continued my thought, “It doesn’t cost anything; it’s free; you just have to go and ask for it. There’s as much as you need.”

I’m not sure if she was just completely amused at the idea, or decided to be more patient, or whatever; I don’t remember at all any further happenings regarding her and that conversation.

But I do remember that a few days later, I was having trouble being patient. Caused I’m sure by circumstances ordinary to any mom: needy kids, overflowing housework, not enough sleep, not enough devotion to Jesus. I was huffy and grumbling in my mind and tired of it all.

These words ran through my head, “You need to go to the Patience Store. There’s as much as you need; you just have to ask for it.”

Big sigh.

It really is that simple isn’t it?

Since that day, I’ve even thought about it further when pondering writing this post. James says that God gives to us liberally without asking why we keep coming back. He gives when we ask for wisdom. This wisdom we ask for is in direct response to the many, various and sudden trials of life. Why can we have joy in these trials? Because they produce that beautiful, precious, high-value virtue… patience.

It’s abundantly available.

I probably need to sign up for the frequent shopper card.